As the last post of 2014, I think it’s appropriate to outline what I have learned in the outgoing year. Whether I experienced things personally or saw someone else go through them, there was always a lesson behind it that helped me develop into the better Emynee that I fully intend to take into the New Year. So, without any further to do, here they are in no particular order:
1.) Intuition: It’s There for a Reason
“Gut feeling”, “conscience” or whatever you want to call it, is in essence the same thing: the little voice inside of us that tells us whether something is great or completely just to the left side of the universe. Earlier this year, I decided to finally listen after developing some suspicion with someone I was on and off with, mostly off though. I discovered that this person was absolutely deceitful and my life was better off without them. Unfortunately, it should not have taken me that long to realize how horribly they were playing with my mind because I began to develop feelings about their character MONTHS before I was faced with reality. When I finally listened to that little voice, I was free and learned that even the smallest whisper will save time and energy.
2.) Sometimes You Just Have to Let Them Go
I’ve never spoken on this to anyone except those who are very close to me, but earlier this year, I lost my best friend in the whole world. For about 10 years, we told each other everything, but after some thinking she decided that it was best for her if we not associate anymore. She had premature feelings of rejection since she felt as if she’d be replaced with my “new” sisters and how everything with me was one-sided, but….eh. After she told me that, I could literally feel my heart shatter, I had to call all the crew because I was in distress. After a few hours of consultation from my other best friends who have remained so dear to me, I realized that people figure themselves out in different ways and they are always right in their own eyes, even if everyone else looking in knows their reality to be completely false. Her feelings of insecurity had not one thing to do with me and my situation or friendship. I did not chase, I did not regret my decision to delete, block, etc., I just let her go. She had to walk down a path that is right to her and all I can do is let her do that. I won’t lie, I miss my friend sometimes, and all the time I catch myself saying, “Dang, I wish I could tell her so and so” but I can’t and that’s okay. If she ever comes back around, it won’t be the same because personally, I don’t get over hurtful things well, but if she never comes back around that’s fine too because, life.
3.) One Statement: Looking through people is a lot less energy depleting than not liking them. I cannot help you grow up, but I can really hope you learn to cash checks your a** wrote before you get into the real world.
4.) Write your vision
For me, it is not enough to say that I will do something; I must actually write it down and see it every day I wake up. If I roll out of bed and read what I have written down every day, even if I’m not reading it aloud, I am putting those vibes of positive energy into the universe. I am speaking things into existence and subconsciously taking steps to ensure that the actions I take are all in line with what I want my life to look like presently or in the future. I was so blessed in 2014. I was reintroduced to someone who I now care about deeply, I became a woman of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc., I received an internship that taught me what I don’t want to do, I had lunch with Dr. Michael Lomax, President and CEO of UNCF, I traveled, made friends from all over the country, was able to speak on behalf of UNCF at a few schools in South Carolina, received a job offer, and several more personal victories that I could honestly go on and on about. Even though there were some things that I would have preferred not to happen, God had a way of showing me those things should be the least of my concerns when looking at all the opportunities He presented to me. I say all that to say, write what you want to see come forth in your life and thank God for those things no matter how big or small you may think they are.
5.) You are enough.
I had to end that one with a period because those three words change lives. You, with your thickness and all your quirks, bad habits, and corny jokes are enough. No need to run around trying imitate “cool” because that’s what you think will get you ahead. Be you in whatever sense that is and watch that be more than enough for everyone who you attract, whether that be professionally, romantically or just in the quest to find girlfriends who you will be able to consider lifelong friends. When you stick out for just being you and perfectly confident in who you are, people take notice and will respect you more for it. You feel like going a week without makeup? Do it. You feel like being alone for a few hours to gather yourself? Be comfortable doing so without being pressured into socializing. You feel like speaking to someone one day and not the next? Okay. So? Who is gonna check you, boo? Nobody. Be unashamedly you and watch things fall in line exactly how you want them to.
6.) No regrets
Take chances, even if you are unsure about something because it is better to have done it then to say you should have done it. Try new things, talk to strangers, help those less fortunate than you, don’t allow people to waste your time, say what is on your mind if it is right, and most importantly love those who are special to you unashamedly to the point of surprising yourself sometimes.
Last but definitely not least I’d like to thank my readers who have continued to support me through another year. I hope your years were as eventful as mine and if not, I am sending vibes of incomparable love and positivity your way with hopes that this upcoming year, will be the best year ever! XOXO